Restraints

There you lie, tied up and subject to your lover's every whim and desire, knowing she or he will bring pleasure (or pain) to your heart's content.  Perhaps your playmate will taunt you with a feather, titillate you with a spanking or tease you with a vibrator. If you're on the other end, seeing your partner “helpless” can be a tremendously erotic feeling.


Sensory deprivation and restraint are two basic bondage activities. Sensory deprivation allows a top to take control of a bottom and to compel the bottom to focus on other senses, thereby intensifying all sensation. Blindfolding is an easy and common method. Securing someone's hands and ankles is at the heart of bondage and can most easily be done with wrist and ankle restraints, and, with a little practice, rope.

Satin Lined Cuffs Wrist Restraints

Restraints

The most comfortable restraints are wrist and ankle cuffs. The fastening mechanisms can be velcro, as on Tickled Pink Restraints and Super Cuffs; or buckles, like  Kookie Cuffs and Candy Apple Restraints.   Velcro closures are easy to fasten and get out of quickly if necessary. Restraints with buckles are more difficult to escape from (this can be a good thing) and many have D-rings which enable you to attach rope or clips (Double Connector) to the restraints.  Bondage equipment such as the Spreader Bar offers a method of securing ankles or wrists a set distance apart.

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Foxtails Bondage Kit

Material

Our cuffs are made of leather or nylon. Nylon is easy to clean, soft, and can be less intimidating than leather. It's also a lot cheaper. On the other hand, many people love the look, feel, and smell of leather. It's stronger and generally will last longer than nylon or cloth. Leather has the incomparable ability to “learn” its wearer and shape to the body over time.


The lining of your restraints is important. Unless you're doing a police interrogation scene, you'll want your partner to be comfortable so they can focus on what you're doing to them, not on whether or not their left arm is going numb. The Suede Restraints (both cuffs and collar available) are lined with soft suede for extra comfort, while the Kookie Cuffs are lined with faux fur (in sexy red, black, or leopard print). New are the Satin-lined Cuffs for chic soft comfort.

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Bondage Harness

Rope Bondage

Rope bondage is versatile and can elevate bondage to an end in itself. Rope feels wonderful against the skin and coils gorgeously in the hands of the restrainer. While people first experiment with bondage using scarves or pantyhose, we do not recommend either because they can continue tightening once the knots are tied and cut off circulation, which can cause circulatory damage. Get some soft nylon rope from your local hardware store (start with rope at least 1/2” in diameter; all cotton rope is difficult to untie) practice, practice, practice! The Bondage Harness is an easy-to-use restraining device that uses leather, buckles, and rope with the look and feel of rope bondage. The Erotic Bondage Handbook is a great resource.

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Doorjamb Cuffs

Safety

Trust is essential. Before any power play, be sure you agree on a range of activities and let your play partner know what is off-limits. Never let someone you don't trust tie you up. Physical safety in bondage scenes involves making sure the bonds aren't too tight, any equipment used is secure, and you have the means of quick release. Even if the bonds aren't tight, holding one position for a long time can cause numbness, aches, and discomfort. So check your partner's hands and feet for temperature and color and keep bondage play to a 20 minute limit at first.

    • Keep Surgeon's Scissors handy for quick release from rope or fabric bonds.
    • Use the “pinkie test” when restraining someone—be sure you can slide one finger between the bonds and the person's skin to prevent nerve or circulation damage.
    • Never restrain someone by the neck.
    • Don't put pressure or restraints on the joints (knees, elbows).
    • If you start feeling numbness or tingling, tell your partner.
    • Be aware of how you are tying up your partner to ensure they don't fall or tip over.
    • Agree on a safe word to end or slow down the scene.
    • Check circulation frequently, either by feeling your lover's hands to see if they're cold or by asking how their hands and feet are doing.

Resources

For more great information on the basics of bondage and SM, see  the Erotic Bondage Handbook. More great books are SM 101 (for all genders and orientations), The New Topping Book and The New Bottoming Book (again, written for everyone) or Screw the Roses, Send Me the Thorns (from a heterosexual point of view). Also check out your local resources and talk to people—you can learn some exciting tricks and important information.

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