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kimcarneyIt's not often that I learn about a new sexual problem outside of Babeland. People always ask us so many questions that I thought I'd hear just about everything. But I was wrong.Brian Alexander, the sex columnist for MSNBC has a column this week about "post-coital tristesse" or sadness after sex. Basically, you have great sex and then you feel depressed afterwards. The better the sex, the worse the depression. This doesn't sound like any fun at all to me because I enjoy the post-orgasm glow so much, it would be a big change to be sad instead of tingly-happy after sex. But, apparently I don't have to worry as much because it seems to strike men more than women. As Brian explains:
It involves the hormone prolactin. That?s the same hormone women need to make milk, but men have it, too, and it shoots sky-high immediately after orgasm... All well and good, but in another study they concluded that prolactin works like a thermostat to shut off our desire, our appetites, and therefore the exciting, revved-up drives that make us try to satisfy them. So you get dull as a worm and your spirit flees. The more satisfying the sex with a woman, the duller you get.
So there you have it - sadness after sex. I hope if there's anyone out there who has been struggling with this, that you know now that you're not alone. Brian doesn't offer a solution but maybe just knowing what's happening would be a help.Speaking of unexplained sexual phenomenon, I would love to know why it is that men are almost always tired after sex whereas sometimes women are tired and sometimes they have more energy than before. What hormone does that?Photo credit: Kim Carney